Hallelujah; for the Lamb has loved me

“Just give me the gift of a tender heart.”
I probably ask that of Jesus more than I ask for most things.
If He so desperately chose to embrace the depths of pain and to clothe Himself in the ache of love, then SURELY there is grace for me to do so!

A song arose in my heart today.
It was a familiar song.
One that has burst through my soul before.

I wept as it bubbled inside of me, wept as it poured forth from my lips, wept as it reached my aching ears. The song of my surrender, the song of my hope. There it was again, the hunger that I so long to leave me undone at the end of every day. It returned! It was heavy! It was overwhelming! Oh, how I sighed with gratitude. My longing was back! My deep feelings! My gift of weeping! My brokenness was back! I was back. I sobbed and sobbed as lyric after lyric, song after song, quote after quote began to take my heart – its pen – and use it to scribble the most wonderful truths inside of me.

I left EGS with a blessed heart to head over to a bonfire for Chrissy Styles. She leaves in the morning, to go back to Fredricksburg, returning once again to a place far away from my heart. I always leave goodbye parties in tears. I wait until I am safely tucked away in my room and then I weep, oh I weep! I am always comforted though, knowing, that the heart of the Lord is wounded with an ever greater wound than I could ever imagine bearing. His heart is much more pained over the separation that is presently His daily reality, the disconnect in totality from His friends. He gets it! This emotional, broken, tender, feeling heart that He has given me is just that, the heart that He has given me. Is it possible to comfort the heart of Jesus? If so, I say, as long as you weep, I will weep with you Jesus. There is a day that the tears of pain will meet their end! There has to be.

Oh for the day that you return Jesus, oh for the day. 

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